The Rocks, Pebbles, and Sand in Our Lives

I think by now, we have all heard the story about the rocks, the pebbles, and the sand in a jar story. If you haven’t or would like to hear my version of this beautiful metaphor, continue reading below.

A philosophy lesson by Professor Stephen Covey, where he once stood up before his class with a large empty mayonnaise jar. He filled that jar to the top with large rocks and asked his students if the jar was full.

The students agreed and said yes, the jar was indeed full.

He went on to add small pebbles to the jar and gave the jar a bit of a shake so the pebbles could disperse themselves among the larger rocks. Then he asked again, “Is the jar full now?”

The students agreed that the jar was still full.

The professor then poured sand into the jar to fill up any remaining empty space. The professor proposed the same question once again. The students agreed that the jar was completely full.

The professor went on to explain that the jar represents everything that is in one's life.

Here’s what the contents of the jar represents thus far.

The rocks represent the things in your life that are most important. This includes the members of your family, the moments enjoyed with your family, close friends, maybe your church and community, and your health (your body and temple). If all you had in your life were these rocks and all the pebbles and sand were lost, your life would still be filled with purpose and meaning.

The pebbles represent the things in your life that matter, but you could still live without. These would include things like your job, your hobbies, your home, and even other friendships. The pebbles certainly enrich your life, but they are not crucial for you to live a meaningful life. These things are considered non-essential and can tend to come and go or change. They do not affect your overall wellness and vitality.

Lastly, the sand represents your material possessions and all those extra “filler” things we collect or do. These are things like running errands, perusing our social media accounts, and watching television. These types of things really do not mean much at all and we can certainly live without them.

So what is the point I’d like to make in sharing this metaphor?

The metaphor here is that we need to give the most attention to the rocks. Here’s why. If we start filling our jar (our life) with the pebbles and sand first, there will not be enough space for the rocks. When we spend our time on all the meaningless, insignificant things in our lives, we will not have enough space for what’s important. These rocks are critical to our overall wellbeing in the long run. (It’s not a conspiracy theory.) The rocks in our lives takes the most forethought, are usually more complex in nature, the most costly (especially if lost), and take the most time to achieve or grow.

For a more purposeful life, begin with focusing on just five or so of those rocks. Your list may look something like this.

·         Spend time with your family, create memories.

·         Foster your faith. Give back. Charity, giving, volunteering, and teaching others gives our lives extreme purpose.

·         Focus on your education and/or personal growth or mentorship. This does not always mean you need to go to a formal school setting.

·         Build solid, meaningful relationships. Be social.

·         Exercise. When we stop moving, we rust.

·         Eat healthy and clean. We need to properly fuel our body and mind.

In conclusion, be sure to schedule or make time for those big things in life first, otherwise you may just run out of time and never get to fit them in at all!